Cooking with Hank – Midnight muncher

RICHLAND CENTER, Wis (WRCO Entertainment) – Welcome to cooking with Hank. Do you have the hunger? If you have a single sad tortilla, Hank can feed you!

Midnight Munch Wrap: “The Gremlin Edition”

Because gourmet doesn’t live here anymore.

Ingredients:

• 1 sad tortilla you found behind the bread
• 2 slices of cheese (the processed kind that sweats when you look at it)
• 3 leftover chicken nuggets (cold, judgmental)
• Handful of crushed Doritos from the bottom of the bag
• 1 rogue pickle slice
• Hot sauce? Maybe. Ranch? Yes. Peanut butter? We’re not here to judge.
• Regret (to taste)

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Instructions:

1. Yawn aggressively and open the fridge like it owes you money.
2. Slap that tortilla down like you mean it on a paper towel because dishes are for daytime.
3. Layer your ingredients like a broke culinary Picasso: cheese, nuggets, pickle, chips, drizzle something spicy or creamy—whatever your half-conscious brain allows.
4. Attempt a microwave wrap job. Fold it like you’ve seen in commercials but end up with a burrito that looks like it lost a fight.
5. Microwave for 43 seconds. Why 43? Because your finger hit the wrong number and you’re too tired to fix it.
6. Stare into the microwave like you’re watching a suspense movie.
7. Take it out carefully. Burn your hand anyway.
8. Eat standing over the sink while wondering where your life turned toward tortilla chaos.
9. Finish it and whisper, “I am unstoppable.”
10. Fall asleep with the pickle juice still open.

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Chef’s Note:
Pairs well with flat soda, warm milk, or whatever’s in that questionable takeout cup.

Would you like a cowboy version next? Or one involving Spam, marshmallows, or both?

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